I’ve had lately these moments of doubt about my traditionalist views. I hesitated to defend Archbishop Vigano. I paused for a second before writing phrases like “the errors of Vatican II,” or “the modernists have a stronghold in virtually every chancery..”
I say “there is an ape of the Church everywhere within its structure eclipsing the true Church.” And then later I think about all the people who read my views, that what I say has to be true and in accord with the Faith, if not I will be punished by God.
But then I re-consider what I wrote, and my intentions, and what I’ve learned about the Church since coming to Tradition, above and beyond what I learned growing up Catholic in the Novus Ordo rite. It would be wrong, untruthful, and scrupulous to seriously doubt what I now know to be true.
It would be against right reason, Catholic truth, and the deposit of Faith. There is no denying or hiding or being silent for an irrational fear of sin that the Church is facing a war within itself between itself and the modernists. That the modernists largely have the seats of power, and orthodox Catholics are left in the shadows, like a kind of underground Church.
There is no sin in defending Vigano, the Faith from the conciliar errors, or resisting the Novus Ordo, and rejecting the new religion that does in fact exist. God will judge us in everything we say or do, including this blog post and every post I’ve written. God knows there have been moments my conscience regretted certain choices of words, but He also knows that I am professing and defending the Catholic Faith publicly as my confirmation commands me to do.
If I am presented with the Catholic Faith vs. a counterfeit version of it, even if that counterfit is embraced by bishops and priests worldwide, I profess the true Faith and reject the false faith they are presenting. And because so few understand that this is the reality, given my own formation in the Faith, philosophical and theological training, and ability to write, I remain steadfast to this little hobby and apostolate.
If I abandoned it out of scruples, given the gift of the Faith God has given me, during an age of disbelief and apostasy, that would be wrong. So I continue.