In my last post I talked about 20 ideas I have that I think are important for good parenting, from a Christian and Catholic perspective. Since the raising of children is the main task of most people, the most important thing they will do with their life, infinitely more important than career or hobbies or other life pursuits, the subject is wirth talking a lot about.
For the sake of organization, here is another list of 10 more ideas about parenting.
1. The first few years after birth are the most critical. The child needs a lot of physical activity to develop their brains, especially in the first year. As in a lot of active playing, crawling, climbing, skipping, integrating more complex activities. They need a constant approach to discipline, crystal clear boundaries, firmness, and an emotionally stable environment. As much moderation in everything as can be given, avoiding laxity and excessive strictness or rigorism. Not spoiling the child, but maintaining always a warm and nurturing relationship with the parent. Early childhood development will lay the foundation for life. Physical or mental abuse including neglect at this stage will have the opposite effect.
2. Positive reinforcement should always be emphasized more than negative reinforcement. Focusing on punishment and correcting bad behavior will drive you crazy and create a rebellion, misbehaving child.
3. Put the child on a reading program as soon as they know how to read. So many books per month their entire childhood. Use Catholic John Senior’s good book reading list based on age of the child. Give rewards for each book read. Have child give a report on the book, even just a brief summary and what they learned or liked about it. Mainly the classics.
4. Make sure each child knows you love them more than your own life, meaning that you would die for them, that you love each one on a personal level with every fiber of your being.
5. Rarely if ever watch TV. Use instead a projector to watch good movies or documentaries but not daily.
6. For the boys, by the time they are an adult, they are able to live independently, survive and thrive on extreme emergency situations, use self defense to protect themselves and others, including the use of weapons, to be physically, mentally, or morally strong by the time they finish bring raised.
7. For the girls, they will achieve the ability to run a household, a home, all the main domestic skills, including parenting and homeschooling skills. By 18, they will be ready for marriage.
8. Do not educate as a preparation for college. Do not encourage college unless the child is very academically gifted or that is the wisest course to a good job. Guide the boys to learn a trade, even if they also go to college.
9. Make sure the kids can spend a lot of time outside in the yard, playground, and neighborhood. Keep a close watch, but it is integral for their development even with all the child predators out there. Take them to the park, chaperone them, but give them space to roam and explore.
10. Enroll all the boys in altar boys. It will help them grow as a Catholic, as a boy into manhood, and to discern the priesthood. Girls should not serve Mass, but perhaps join the altar and rosary guilds, making vestments and rosaries, helping to prepare the church and altar for Mass, or to sing in the choir.
As before, my two cents.